Oops! I assumed….

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Making assumptions about how people think of us is very dangerous. Firstly because we have no assurance of these assumptions, and secondly we make these discisions on our own, without knowing the other side of the story.

My thoughts on this is that you give in to a thought that you make up in your mind, you also get frustrated with a lie, because assumptions are not true most of the time.

For an example let's say you greet a person with a smile and take it further with a hug. You notice that the person is not as excited as you are, the next thing you assume that they are angry with you.

The next time you meet them you are not as warm as you were on your last interaction because you have concluded that they don't like you.

You've made up your mind that the said person has a vandetta against you. The danger in this is that you are the only one who thinks this way, you don't have proof of your convictions. Others take it as far as ‘oh no we are not talking’ saying this to other people.

This spreads rumours about you having beef with so and so. You see how it escalates without proof? To think that all of these scenarios could start with just a greeting that didn't go the way you expected, and it escalates to other people who have no proof of what you told them.

What am I saying all in all? We need to work hard on our emotional intelligence. We can avoid a lot of stress if we just think about issues differently and not take everything personally. Let's stop taking things personally.

If a person doesn't want to greet you lovingly you don't have to take that on your shoulders. It is a strenuous exercise, especially when you don't have all the facts.

My new rule is this, If I don't hear a person saying something to me, I have no business working my mind into depression about things I invented in my mind.

I think many relationships fail to flourish because of making assumptions about each other. Assuming things are not going well when you did not ask the person means you are lying to yourself, and you have a potential of involving others in your lie. What is are your thoughts on ‘making assumptions’? - Avuyile Mngxitama-Diko #rookielifecoach